Wednesday, June 17, 2009


I have just heard from Gina at Clutterpunk that I am the WINNER of a Swiney! I am beside myself. It was love at first sight ever since Gina first posted her anatomically, virologically accurate Swine Flu softie. Just check out those “cute green neuraminidases and swanky red haemagglutinin right down to the eight strands of RNA in the middle.” Swiney appeals to my sense of humour in every way – nuthin’ like facing a pandemic with a smile on your dial.

Because I am such a delighted winner, but also because I have received so much recent group voodoo therapy from you all, here’s one ridiculous offer. Leave a comment detailing a shopping experience from which you are yet to make a full recovery and you’ll be in with a chance to WIN. It doesn’t have to be related to the same store as my own shopping nemesis - and please, no actual naming while shaming. The prize is a CUSTOM MADE voodoo,* I mean, pincushion doll. But it’s all win win, because with venting comes inner peace. You’ll be a tranquil-er craftster for participating. Entries close at the clang of midnight this Sunday June 21st.

* It’s not real, like, scary or stuff. It’s just for sticking pins in so you don’t step on ’em with your bare feet.


CurlyPops said...

Ha! I reckon you'll get some doozies from the shopping trips of any crafters who have been to crafty shopping hell (ie S@*%#@*t)!
I really really want to enter cos I really really want my very own voodoo doll.... but I feel way too guilty after returning home today to find that I'd won three (yes three) giveaways!

One Flew Over said...

Oh this is a doosie. In Coles last week with my 2 kids who had colds (daughter has since been diagonosed with pneumonia) anway...was getting the head shake and glare from some woman who physically moved her trolley to another check out.. ah 'do you have a problem' (ME)

'Yes, that child should not be here' (COW)

'Excuse me?'

'I have just had a liver transplant and that child should not be here' (COW)

'Ah, if you are so worried about your health you should have someone else do your shopping for you. Let me elighten you..there are probably at least 20 people here who are sick and you wouldn't know. YOU SHOULD NOT BE HERE' (ME)

I then put my back to her and frogmarched the kids outta there!

Sandra @ Pepperberry & Co. said...

Oh, how perfect is that prize for you? It's your sense of humour in a softie!

Shopping experience? Can I simply tell you about my damn housesitter experience? No? Ok, well...

There was this one time that I went to my favourite clothing store, found my dream top (a business shirt in the shape of a corset with these gorgeous silky ties on the back and room for my giant boobs without making me look like an elephant... sigh. It was pure pleasure) only to find they didn't have it in my size.

I got the friendly (by friendly, I mean way-too-young-to-have-a-job-and-why-is-she-chewing-that-gum-while-talking-to-me-what-is-the-world-coming-to kind of friendly) sales assistant to call around the other stores to find one in my size for me.

She found one all the way on the other side of town, so I got them to hold it and drove across. I got there, and it was the wrong top. Clearly her chewing gum had got stuck in the earpiece because she'd read the wrong barcode number to them.

So, I got the new friendly (similar type of friendly to the last) sales assistant to call around, and yes, there was a store that had 5 in stock in their holding room.

Guess which store it was?

The original one.

Dear lord, everyone on the whole planet is stupid.

Grace said...

Oooh! Love this voodoo pin cushion.
Shopping.... well, trying to conserve $ in this economy but I must say I am a sucker for sales... fabric sales, kids clothes sales. I'm guilty of buying both fabric and kids clothes that are not needed in this home.
Congrats on your win win!

Katy said...

My terrible shopping story is from Lincraft, i finish work at 5pm everyday and they close at 5.30pm. I think they have a rule where for the last 1/2 hour of the day they are just going to be grumpy old cows.

I have several but the one that comes to mind...

"Can you cut me off some PVC Plastic?"

Response: Huuufff, stare of discontent, walk over to PVC like i have sent her to her to walk a 100km marathon..

Sorry i didn't want to actually have to work!

Worst thing is it is the only big fabric shop within a 45min radius, bummer!!

Madeline said...

Now that's a cool softie!
Okay, so as far as stores go there's one that I dread entering. It's sort of a must every month or two, but I put it off as long as possible. It's a superstore, and it makes me super irritated. We've nicknamed it the life sucking void. It so gigantic that my entire body aches after going through it. The workers and patrons tend to look quite zombified, and quite frankly, I feel like a zombie by the time I exit.
The last time we ventured in, Levi seemed to get the same life sucking void vibe. He screamed through nearly the entire trip. Although I tried to make it a short one, it was impossible. We spent nearly 1/2 an hour in the checkout line. They never ever have enough checkouts open. I vowed never to go back. Somehow, though I'll end up there again. On occasion I run out of something that they seem to have cornered the market in. Argh!

cowgirltazz said...

I would love to win this little doll. I have visions of sticking pins in "her". Read about "her" below!

I recently went on a fabric binge (yes, my name is Julie, I am a fabricaholic). I was thrilled with my many, many bargains (to the tune of about 20 bolts) & was having the girl/twit/beaatch cut up my lengths. After she was finished, she handed me the pile & said, "You, know I don't think any of these are really great colors or patterns for a woman of your size."

I was so ticked that I handed her the stack back & told her to please place them forcefully where the sun doesn't shine.

Since I'm a size 14 and she was prob a size -2, she's lucky I just didn't sit on her!

Michelle said...

The girl who works at my local chemist drives me NUTS. Not only does she ask stupid questions, but she is really intrusive and SHRILL at the same time.

Last month I had a cold, so popped in with a script for something else, and while I waited asked for some cold and flu tabs. I knew what I wanted, was prepared to show ID for it. But no, she had to grill me about what the other script was for. And she asked really loudly, in a small pharmacy in front of 10 waiting customers. I told her that the script was for a drug which WOULDN'T affect the cold and flu, or vice versa. I didn't want to tell all the other people what the script was for! Eek! She went on and on and insisted, and eventually I told her to ask the chemist - I wasn't going to violate my privacy in front of all these other people.

At that point the chemist called across to her and told her to leave it alone. She was all "but, but, but" and he was really firm. "No" he said, "it's no one's business, especially not yours".


She's just lucky I didn't sneeze on her.

Last week I was back with another cold. I asked for the same drugs, and she asked "what are you symptoms?", while looking at me with snotty nose, hacking cough and bright red nose and eyes. I told her "Cold symptoms - are you going to sell me these tablets or not?". Then I gave her the death stare.

She backed down.

Cathy {tinniegirl} said...

Great win on the swiney. I would love to win one of your fab voodoo dolls. You could easily open a custom voodoo etsy shop I think.

I often find myself scarred from visit to the Body Shop and their over zealous sales approach. My 'favourite' experience was when I was in there shopping for a gift and the sales person asked me if I knew if the gift was for a male or a female. Doh, I wonder if I know who I'm buying the gift for? I told her I did know but didn't share the gender.