Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Flogging a Dead Horse



Because I’m a bit slow on the uptake, the day after I morphed the glittery size 16 ladies jumper into a toddler dress and the two year old refused to ever, not ever, (not even when hell freezes over) wear it, I thought I’d give the clothing the toddler thing One. Last. Whirl. Leonie recently posted a tute on a simple (and you can make it reversible!) wrap skirt. There was nothing to lose.



Whipped up in a jiffy, I went with the suggested kid-friendly velcro closure. Half the morning battles these days, are initiated by two year old I DO IT MYSELF! frustration. With a minimum of help, the kid can manage dressing with velcro.

Well.

She loved the skirt long enough to get her in the car for a visit to the glorious McClelland Gallery + Sculpture Park.

Long enough to wave at the inspiring Dame Elisabeth lunching in the cafeteria.

Long enough for some impressively sized sculptural pieces to go entirely unnoticed.









Long enough for the smallest (kid-height) details to undergo intense scrutiny.





Long enough to FREAK OUT at the weird, echo-ey voices coming from the sphere-thingies...



Long enough to dig out the fish escape route.



NOT long enough to find the car and be back home.

Turns out velcro skirts are even easier for a toddler to remove. Turns out ripping off a skirt provides great dramatic effect at the height of a hissy fit. Turns out the toddler only ever wanted to wear the same sleeveless party dress for seven days running, including the frosty autumnal morning bits (dead horses all fallen by the wayside – at least she’s not nudey). Turns out Mummy should plaster a ‘KID IS NOT COLD EVEN IF SHE LOOKS BLUE’ sign on her own forehead, to ward off the holier-than-thou tutting that comes from supermarket shopping on the same day as Discount for Pensioners Day.

Flogged horse pronounced clinically dead and buried sans fanfare.

46 comments:

Needled Mom said...

Amazing how opinated they are at that age!!!!!! The metal sculptures are wonderful.

Sally said...

Awesome day out!!! Even if you were riding a dead horse. Skirt looks great... might make myself a velcro wrap so that I can strip down next time I want to punctuate my point in an arguement.

Liesl said...

I hear you, lady. Master 3's garment of choice is a toddler's UPF50+ swim onesie. He receives odd looks at the supermarket. I am yet to work out if its the lime lycra ... or the fact that he looks like he is about to do the clean-and-jerk in an Olympic event.

Really great skirt. Have you considered adding some Tarzan's Grip to the velcro (or if desparate, Miss 2)?

Lola Nova said...

For a minute there I was thinking, 'oh, I ought check out that tut and make me a velcro wrappy type skirt. See, even my "big girl" of 5, is want to rip off a velcro skirt and perhaps wear it on her head...during school hours.

Wonderful photos of what looks to be a lovely time.

flowerpress said...

Sorry, I shouldn't be laughing!!!
I hope Dame Elisabeth was long gone by the time of the tantrummed derobing.
As my mother in law always says, (meant to be encouraging!) "she won't be doing that when she's 18". You hope ;-)

mrs smith said...

That sounds exactly like my day without all the beautiful bits. It's lucky two year olds are cute or I would have misplaced mine by now.

sue said...

Oh she does look super cute in her skirt and I love her red boots too. Isabelle only used to wear what she wanted from the time she turned 3, no help needed and she had to choose what she was going to wear. Nothing has changed either, she now only wears what she picks but I get to choose from the shops what she gets, otherwise I hate to think what she would wear out, lol!

mrs smith said...

I meant my day didn't have all the beautiful bits... Maybe two year olds have some antifreeze component we are unaware of that supports there tulle and slinky fabric habits ?

Off The Peg said...

Ohh my gosh! Too funny!
The sculpture park looks amazing

Fer said...

I still think you deserve a medal for what you did accomplish!

Stomper Girl said...

Well, I hope she grows out of it (this stage) before she grows out of it (that cute skirt)

june at noon said...

Nice of you to be so accommodating in making a skirt that was easy to rip off when the time was right! :)

Love those red boots.

Mel said...

I am feeling ever more grateful that my girl was a very easygoing 2. (The tail end of three has been less than fun, mind you, but at least she likes to be clothed, even if there is TOO MUCH PINK!)

Chicken Willow said...

Love it. The skirt is gorgeous. Maybe you can give it away. I thought the velcro was a brilliant idea...until I got to the end of your post, very funny.

Melanie Coffey said...

Oops. That was me being all anonymous(ish) there. I am still having Mac vs PC 'issues'.

Anonymous said...

I love everything about this blog except for this business of a toddler preempting your (completely reasonable)parenting decisions about something as basic as dressing for the weather. You know, it _is_ in fact possible to get a toddler to dress sensibly. Offer choices, outline (and stick with) tangible consequences when she refuses. "So, you're not going to dress for the weather? Well, then, we're not going to the park!" I reckon you could get her happily wearing that lovely sparkly remix again within a week once the terms of the clothing relationship were re-set.

Leonie Guld said...

I'm sitting here pissing myself laughing at the nudie run!!! Maybe some buttons next time!!! He he xx
Skirt looks good tho...so how was the pattern...clear as mud!!!

Mel said...

I have no concerns about the kid what-so-ever so what I will comment on is the AWESOME like, AWWWWEEESSSOOMMMEE photography! Lady, you know how to take a shot! Gorgeous! x

Tania said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
crzylady said...

i now want a velcroed skirt I can wear to work and rip off during meetings .. instead of just imagining ripping heads off. Seems much more liberating ;)

Kirsty said...

All the smalls insisted on dressing as the current fave disney character. Fine when it was Peter Pan, Madeline, Melody, Superman not so great when it was Tarzan.

(I did fashion a fabulous suede loin cloth for him out of an old vest & a pair of tights). He also didn't feel the cold & still doesn't. Wears shorts all year. x

Tania said...

Dear Anonymous

Actually, I'm fairly comfortable with the parenting decisions I make. I can assure you, that when it truly matters, the kid is wearing appropriate clothing. In the meanwhile, I’m only too happy for the kid to take responsibility for her own attire and frosty toes (although I swear her blood contains an antifreeze), with the back-up jumper lurking in the bag.

Bellgirl said...

Ha ha! Our friend's mummy has a policy that, regardless of what her dauughter wears, she must wear undies- in case it all gets whipped off at an unexpected moment. Actually that's the reason I usually wear undies myself ;)

Bellgirl said...

Ugh, i just read "anonymous". How ghastly. I'm not surprised they decided to be anonymous.

You don't suppose it was Dame Elizabeth Murdoch, in a dither about being flashed in the car-park, do you?

Tracey said...

Fabulous skirt, fabulous parenting xx

dillpickle said...

My 18 month old decided she would try to dress herself yesterday. Entirely unsuccessful in this instance, but I can just see where this is heading...

Thanks for the link to the park. I hadn't heard about it before and it looks like a great place to take interstate visitors who like arty type things! I'm always on the lookout for new ideas that are also kid-friendly these days!

Frog, Goose and Bear said...

you write so well - hilarious! that sculpture park looks fantastic - might just have to give it a visit some time ourselves.

Jenny from Ohjoh said...

I think that horse staggered from my house to yours before ultimately breathing it's last breathe.
Officially, I give up! and am now waiting for pneumonia.

Nikki said...

Love the skirt... and I think I'm in love with your self-assured toddler (...just kind-of glad I can love her at that safe non-parental distance where I can admire her spirit and not have to worry about tut-tutting grannies or parental advice from anonymous people).

Just pencilled in a trip to the sculpture park with the man of the house and the kid here. Thanks for the link. (Man of the house knew all about it but had never mentioned it before).

A Peppermint Penguin said...

Bucks Fizz - she is member of a Bucks Fizz tribute band "Making your mind up".

I think you need some pretty embroidery - or perhaps a spot of screen printing - and sew a panelon the back of all the summer dresses "I INSISTED in wearing this. I am NOT cold."

Love those red boots.

Pensioners (en masse) love a good tut, made their day.

Your photos are too good. Anyone would think you were a trained artist ;-)

Cheers,
AJ

PS oh this is brillian.... my verification word here is...

offshe

Sue said...

Once I knew a little boy who lived in a yellow plastic raincoat and knitted beanie from the age of 18mths until 5yrs. All year round. NO JOCKS and he climbed a lot. He grew up and made it into (and out of) Uni. You go girl!
signed...Mrs Nearly Pension Age

ecoMILF said...

Your posts always make me laugh! I am so disappointed she's not wearing that sweater dress- I thought it was genius. Hopefully the wrap skirt will be able to be altered for a later date. xo m.

nikkishell said...

LOVE it! I'm going to make my girls some.

Catherine said...

I think I need to get one of those forehead signs too! the skirt looks great!

Kylie said...

Love it all - especially the drama queen striptease at the end :)) Love the look of that sculpture park too! Just catching up on last missed post too - how wonderful does that sound!? So glad to had a ball and just fabulous seeing all the makery. Kx

Copper Patch said...

Bye bye horsey.
Hello potential stripping career :o)

Melanie Gray Augustin said...

Oh, you do know how to make a gal laugh...sorry! I've got all that to look forward to.

Love the look of the sculpture park!

Madeline said...

Oh, little one! So cute...and so fiesty!

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

Your very own Gypsy Rose Lee . Perfect !

Julia said...

My now 3 year old was exactly the same when she was 2...actually she still has many days like this. I eventually copied her favourite well worn party dress in polo fleece with a tulle skirt overlay. She loved it...for a week. But at least she felt party-ish and was warm for those sweet brief days. x

Kate said...

Ok so I said that there was no way Miss Pepper was going anywhere your inappropriately dressing two year old but she must have been reading your last couple of posts over my shoulder because this morning out of nowhere she declared she was wearing undies and a t'shirt down the street. Nothing I could say or do would change her mind. So she did. I don't think she was even cold. She didn't show it if she was anyway.

Michelle said...

Y'know - I hear a straightjacket is pretty hard to remove, even for toddlers.

(Cute photos!! I'm impressed you saw Dame Elisabeth. I was on a plane with Stephanie Alexander on the weekend and I'm still skipping!)

Alison said...

Man, now I know where Pia's been getting her inspiration from.

Karin van D. said...

Hahahaha. Oh my. Do you mind if I laugh out loud reading this? I so recognize this :)

I think, from what I read here, that you are a wonderful mom. And I think it's very good for little ones to learn to have some responsibility too, to get to choose now and then and to have an idea of control of what they are wearing, for instance.

Here that thought sometimes results in a street filled with children in very odd colour combinations, or a bike ride with a policeman in a princess dress (or a princess with a police hat? Oh well) or a supermarket visit with one child in a wintercoat and another one in a t-shirt, all on the same moment. As long as they can breathe and are able to express their opinion so determined, I am sure they will survive :-)

chaletgirl said...

I seriously love you. Without being all weird and freaky and all.

craftschmaft.com said...

Ahhh yes... we are experiencing the very same refusal to wear clothes around here. Turns out that showing the munchkin how to pull his own pants down (toilet training) were a big mistake.

I thought it was just a very male thing to want to be naked all the time, but you've enlightened me, Tania, to it being a very two thing. Thank god I'm not the only one :)